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As Solomon, the wisest man of all, said, “For wisdom is better than jewels, and all that you may desire cannot compare with her”, (Proverbs ). A man who does not want counsel and hides from accountability is a man who is not ready to be open with a wife.
Paul writes in 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5, “For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, not in passion of lust like the Gentiles who do not know God; that no one transgress and wrong [defraud] his brother in this manner, because the Lord is an avenger in all these things…” God’s will is for your sanctification, which includes purity. If it is not, then he is a defrauder, who loves himself more than you or God. How does your date cope when things do not go as planned?
Does he spew his anger all over everyone, including you? Proverbs -25 says, “Make no friendship with a man given to anger, nor go with a wrathful man, lest you learn his ways and entangle yourself in a snare.” If you are not to make friendships with angry people, why would you covenant yourself to someone who fits this description? If he would more readily spend a day on the lake than helping someone in need, this indicates where his heart lies.
Proverbs makes it clear that you will only be ensnared. You may actually become an enabler who receives the brunt of his anger. Those little childlike qualities may seem really cute right now, but it will grow old (and aggravating) shortly into marriage. If a man is not responsible with his time, money, and work, why would he be responsible in his future family life? You should also consider your date’s relationships with other people.
He is author of more than 50 books, including Reading the Bible Supernaturally.
A podcast listener named Nathan writes in to ask: “Is online Christian dating a good way to meet a future spouse if you don’t meet anyone through your church family?